Day 136 – Life without my Macbook…
I have conflicting feelings about not being able to edit and post my dances “live” this week, but the reality is – I can’t. I’ve had to turn my computer in for repairs and without it I don’t have the tools necessary to edit and upload them to Youtube.
What I do have is a lot of extra time. Mark has encouraged me to take this time to write more about my feelings and the process. He would…he’s a writer! I’m borrowing his little netbook to make this entry. It’s a fine machine, but the keyboard is tiny – I don’t know how he spends all day writing on it, but he’s pretty much amazing to me in so many ways….
I am relieved to have a bit of a break from the pressure that I’ve been putting on myself to come up with something new and different and somehow fantastic every day. I’m not saying I’ve accomplished that – just that I push myself for it. But I also feel like I may be failing to fulfill the original commitment I set out at the beginning. I have a voice in my head from long ago telling me I’ll never finish anything I start. I don’t think that’s true…so my challenge this week is to allow myself to let things be fluid – and not try to shove the project into a box. Hahaha…the name of it is “the Freebox” for a reason.
I cannot control the outside world. I can only choose how to respond to it. Without the tools, I can’t post videos but I can still dance everyday – documented or not. This project, above all, is an exercise in creativity, improvisation and expression. In working more with the unknown than the known I’ve learned to trust in the moment and use whatever shows up as a resource for the creative process. It’s worked pretty well so far.
I am making a choice to use this week’s circumstances to delve into observing the process thus far and to give strong consideration to shaping the future of the project.
There are some interesting developments going on behind the scenes that I’ll share this week. In the meantime – I’ll be re-posting some of the most popular and my favorite videos. Maybe you haven’t seen them yet – or if you have – perhaps you’ll enjoy seeing them again.
Here’s The Walmart Waltz:
Thanks for providing eyes and ears for these creations. I really appreciate it.